LOVE STORY OF A PHD STUDENT !!

"I was in 12th, She was in 12th"

"I got BSc, She got BCA"

" I was doing MSc, She got Married"

" I was preparing for JRF, She's mother of 1 Chid"

"I am an intern to the Phd, She is mother of 2 children"

" I finally did Phd, her daughter is in 1st std"

" I became doctorate, Her daughter passed 10th"

" I have joined job, Her daughter has finished her college"

The Greatest Irony.....
Today is my engagement and her daughter is my fiancee...

I will never do Phd again!

Juz for laugh!!

3 Easy Ways to Die :

Take a Cigar daily - You will die 10 years early.

Drink Rum daily - You will die 30 years early.

Love Someone Truly - You will die daily.


1. A foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.


2.. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :

Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD

After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY


3. Three FASTEST means of Communication :

1. Tele-Phone

2. Tele-Vision

3. Tell to Woman

Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANYONE.


4.. Love your friends not their sisters.. Love your sisters not their friends.


5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman. Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.


Moral : BE SPECIFIC


6. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life. If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.


7.. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.


Answer : On their MARRIAGE..


8. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY to GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if you are still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.


9. Why Government does NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.

Because per Constitution, you can NOT BE PUNISHED TWICE for the same Mistake.

Quotable Marriage Experiences !!

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin, they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't."

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

Rajini style proposal !!!

A Desi chap was deeply in love with this pretty girl, whom he wanted. But he did not have the courage to talk to her in person.

So he decided to go alone and with the help of a dictionary, he wrote a letter of proposal to her.


HE WROTE :


Most worthy of your estimation after a long consideration and much mediation, I have a strong indication to become your relation.

As to my educational qualification, it is no exaggeration or fabrication, that I have passed my matriculation examination (no doubt without any hesitation and very little preparation).

What do you say to the solemnization of our marriage celebration according to the glorification of modern civilization and with a view to the expansion of the population of present generation. On your approbation of the application,

I shall make preparation to improve my situation, and if such obligation is worthy of consideration it will be our argumentation of the joy and exaltation of our joint dissimilation.

Thanking you in anticipation and with devotion; To remain victim of your fascination.



SHE ANSWERED :

Dear Mr. Victim of my fascination,

Congratulation for your lengthy narration of course full of affection aimed at an affiliation for a combination which on examination I find is a fine presentation of your ambition.

You have passed your matriculation with little preparation, what about my graduation after a long botheration, so improve situation in education and make an application by acquisition of post graduation and minimum qualification for the convocation and before taking your photo for circulation undergo beautification.

Further strict observation of the following conditions is the regulation for the determination of our relation.

1. Consultation of my parents before approaching for my connection.

2. Communication of your confirmation that you are not a victim of any fascination and,

3. Procreation must not be your recreation.

In anticipation of a solid action instead of continuation of paper conversation.

I Remain, unaffected by your affection.

Beautiful words!!!

1] Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble; it is a "steering wheel" that directs us in the right path throughout life.

2] Do you know why a car's WINDSHIELD is so large & the rear view mirror is so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. So, look ahead and move on.

3] Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write.

4] All things in life are temporary. If going is well enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going is wrong don’t worry, they can't last long either.

5] Old friends are like Gold! New friends are Diamonds! If you get a Diamond, don't forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a base of Gold!

6] Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, "Relax, sweetheart, it's just a bend, not the end!

7] When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities; when GOD doesn't solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities.

8] A blind person asked St. Anthony: "Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision."

9] When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them; and sometimes, when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed for you.

10] WORRYING does not take away tomorrow's TROUBLES; it takes away today’s PEACE.

Man O Man !!!

When without money, eats wild vegetables at home
When has money, eats same wild vegetables in fine restaurant.

When without money, rides bicycle.
When has money, rides exercise machine.

When without money, walks to earn food
When has money, walks to lose the fat

Man O Man ! never fails to deceive thyself !

When without money, wishes to get married;
When has money, wishes to get divorced.

When without money, wife becomes secretary;
When has money, secretary becomes wife.

When without money, acts like rich man;
When has money, acts like poor man.

Man O Man ! Never means what he says and never says what he means!

COMPLETELY FINISHED!!!

The difference between COMPLETE & FINISH!!!

People say there is no difference between COMPLETE & FINISH....

But there is!

When you marry the right one, you are COMPLETE.....

And when you marry the wrong one, you are FINISHED.....

And when the "right one" catches you with the "wrong one", You are COMPLETELY FINISHED